a daily reminder

When Ruthann first spoke to me about this blog, I had images of "everyday" beauty- ya know, finding the beauty in the clouds, laundry, or the dishes and dog... food. :) I'm not sure how that's actually gonna go, but I'm going to start by introducing you to part of my 'everyday'.  A beauty-full part.  A challenging part. The best part. She's been with me since she was 10, and she just turned 17.  Many of you know Heather, but in case you don't, here's the short version.  In 2005 I welcomed the first of a few special needs foster children into my house, not really having any idea what to expect.  We haven't looked back since, except to remember where she was, and how far she's come.  She is many things... loving, clingy, funny- so funny, giving, indecipherable to most, needy, affectionate (unless she's mad), social, friendly- overly so at times.. and so much more. 

I've been thinking a lot about her since the Beauty-Full Life workshop at Ruthann's house in October.  I think of her everyday, of course, but not always past her immediate needs.  I don't always focus on her character, her personality, her heart.  When Ruthann and I were tossing around ideas about some sort of media representation of being "Beauty-Full", her sweet voice popped into my head, and I heard all the times she looked in the mirror and said 'beautiful', all the times she looked at me and said "beautiful."  The times we went bathing suit shopping and she thought every single one was "cute cute", no matter that some of them, in fact, were not at all attractive. I saw the two of us getting ready in my room, and her asking for make up, and loving the sight of herself after a little translucent powder.

She really is the perfect woman- she has no clue what our culture expects of her- she just knows she's beautiful.  She doesn't care what our culture expects from me, she just thinks I'm beautiful.  She laughs in the face of bathing-suit-shopping, and how many of us can say that??   She's the example of the women we could be if we didn't allow the media and the culture and the men to decide if we're beautiful or not. She is lacking is so many things, but self esteem is not one of them. 

I'm a thinker, so this image of her beauty-full-ness has stuck with me.  And then it merged into another image of her that kinda surprised me.

Instead of thinking of her reactions to herself, I thought of my reactions to her.  I thought of the times I've yelled at her, just because I'm having a bad day.  I thought of the times I've been frustrated with her, because I can't figure out what she's trying to say.  I thought about the times I've been annoyed with her, because she needs me.

And yet, she thinks I'm beautiful.

When I leave the house, she waits for me to get home.  When she knows she won't see me again until she wakes up, she spends hours trying to go to bed early, just so that it will be morning. She makes me tell her I love her over and over (I think she's just making sure I don't forget). She'd sit on my lap for hours if my legs didn't fall asleep.

Despite my sometimes ugly reactions to her, she thinks I'm beautiful, and wants to be with me, spend time with me, hear my voice. Sound familiar?

The girl who doesn't have the cognitive skills to understand grace and mercy, heaven and hell, Jesus and God, is a living, breathing example of how God loves us- He thinks we're beautiful.  He wants to be near us. Hear our voice. Love us. Be loved by us.

He thinks I'm beautiful.  She thinks I'm beautiful. 

2006

2010

She IS Beauty-Full.

I am so thankful that He sent me a beautiful reminder of just how much He loves me. 

Be blessed,

Brooke

In case you missed the post over the weekend, check it out, and help us give at least 1 beautiful girl in Thailand freedom from sexual slavery for every day in January.  We only need 2 more days covered, but why stop there?