white as snow

We didn't get a ton of snow yesterday, but when I looked out my window in the morning, it was enough to make my yard look pretty.  If you've seen my "yard", you know this is quite a feat!

As I walked around while the dog frolicked in the snow (yea, my dog frolicks), I noticed a pile of snow behind my house.  I noticed it because it's actually a pile of trash.  A pile of trash and building materials that has been back there for longer than I care to admit.  Don't judge me- there's worms under there, and spiders, and probably a whole colony of killer mutant bugs that are just waiting for me to move something in that pile so they can get me. 

What struck me about the pile is that it looked pretty.  It was white, clean, fresh.  All glimmery in the early morning light.

Just like us, as Isaiah 1:18 tells us. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be white as snow." When we come to the Lord, our sins are forgiven, and we are no longer stained.  The blood of Christ covers us- we are white as snow.  Just like my trash pile. 

Then, as the day wore on, it rained a bit, the snow was washed away, melted into slush.  More and more of the trash pile was uncovered.  It was less and less pretty.

Unfortunately, this is also like us sometimes.

The little pieces of trash sticking out from my pile are similar to the unforgiveness I hold in my heart.  The accidental sins I can't let go of.  The on-purpose sins I won't let go of. The worry. The guilt.  The past relationships. The hurt I've caused. The hurt I've felt. The judgements I pass. The judgement I feel. All this stuff starts sticking out of my snow-white-ness, and I'm not so pretty anymore.

That trash pile and I are so alike in so many ways.  We are pretty when we're covered by snow.  Covered by Christ.  Sometimes the ugly sticks out.  And sometimes it's easier to hold on to the trash than face the spiders (for those of you who don't know me that well, I'm REALLY REALLY REALLY afraid of spiders.  As in, I should seek professional help).

If I want that trash gone, I'm going to have to suck it up, put on some spider-proof gloves, and move it out of there. I can't just sit around and hope the snow won't melt. 

Fortunately, there are no spiders hiding in my heart... but I find that I don't want to deal with what is in there any more than I want to deal with the spiders.

Sometimes it's easier to bury hurt than deal with it.  Feels better to hold on to anger than to forgive. Passing judgement on others quickly means it won't hurt as much when they judge me. Sin is easier than righteousness. 

 2 Corinthians 5:17 tells me I am a new creation

"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come."

Romans 8:1 Tells me that God does not condemn me for my past.  

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus; because through Christ Jesus, the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death."

Why am I so eager to hang on to the old, when I've been made new?  Why do I continue to clothe myself in scarlet, when He's bleached me white as snow? Why do I choose to condemn myself for my past sins, when He chooses to forget them?
 
 He tries to make it easy for us- He already willingly bore our sins (1 Peter 2:24). He asks for our burdens (Matt 11:28).

My sins? He paid the price.
My hurt? He feels it too.
My guilt? He chose condemnation so I wouldn't have to face it.

Sometimes I feel like I'm saying "Thanks but no thanks".  Thanks for bearing my sin, but I'll just hold on to this piece of it for a little bit longer.  Thanks for offering to carry my burdens, but well, I really need to work out anyways. Thanks for dying so that I could live life to the fullest, but I'm just not quite ready for "the fullest" yet.  Maybe tomorrow.


How bout you?  Feeling all snowy white today? If not, what are you holding onto that He's already paid the price for?

We'll be a whole lot more Beauty-Full when we stop uncovering what He's already forgotten. 


Be blessed,


Brooke