Woman to Woman

How much time every day do you spend thinking about other women? A strange question, yes, but I’m willing to assume that it’s more time than you think.

You see, we women have a terrible tendency to constantly compare ourselves to other women. We do it for one reason: pride. We either compare ourselves to other women so that we can point out everything that we do better than them, OR, we compare ourselves to other women to covet what we think they do better than us.

We notice that we raised our children differently (the right way, of course). We notice that we make our husband lunch more often than them. We notice that we volunteer more, drink less, read our Bible more, clean better, or do any number of things more/different/better/less/right.

Then on the other hand, we notice that they are thinner than us, have better hair than us, work out more than us, have a better home than us, cook better, have nicer clothes, make more money, have better behaved children, have a more Godly husband, and of course they probably have no problems at all in their life whatsoever….

Last week I wrote about looking at people within their own context. So first of all, remember that as you compare yourself to other women, you’re probably making all the wrong assumptions.

More importantly, why do we constantly look to other women to boost our ego, validate our own behavior, or aspire to be like? The Bible tells us that we are created in God’s image, that we’re all unique, that we all have different gifts, and most importantly, that we should all strive to be more like Christ. NOT EACHOTHER.

It’s not wrong to look up to other women, to take their advice, to be mentored by them, to respect them, or to have a healthy admiration for them. It is wrong to covet the things they have, are, or do. If you want to make a change, seek what the Bible says about the woman God created you to be. Don’t worry about the fact that the pastor’s wife has great hair, next-to-perfect children, and a husband after God’s own heart.  She’s got issues of her own. Seek what God wants for YOU.

How are we supposed to live in community with one another, encourage one another, and fulfill God’s mission alongside one another if we’re constantly judging, comparing, gossiping, and coveting….that’s not a very beauty-filled way to treat one another, whether we do these things out loud or not.

We shouldn’t be comparing ourselves to other women, we should be comparing ourselves with what the Word says. We shouldn’t be coveting, idealizing, and idolizing one another. We should be striving to be more Christ-like. We shouldn’t be degrading ourselves based on someone else’s apparent “togetherness.”

Let’s make the conscious effort to have a more beauty-full attitude towards other women. To encourage one another, to be uplifting, and to lay our judgments aside and consider the missions set forth for us in God’s Word. Think about how the community of believers would change if women started to change their attitude about other women? Less drama, less gossip, less judgment, less fear, more encouragement, more togetherness, more humbleness, more respect, more love. More Jesus.

In Him,

Jill